Why Love Involves Teaching

There’s a few around that the most romantic thing you could tell someone else is, ” I don’t want to change a thing about you, ‘I love you exactly as you are.” According to a prevalent romantic philosophy, Love is definitely not meant to be about trying to alter another person. But, a blanket refusal to listen to any idea of change at our lover’s hands would only make sense if we were in fact, already more or less perfect. and yet, the more time two people spend around each other, the more they’re naturally going to spot things that are a little less than ideal. It might be something quite small – their way of chewing perhaps. Or something larger. Their attitude towards their career or family. Many other people might’ve spotted these problems before – If they never said anything, it’s not because they’re nicer – just far less concerned. But our lovers can and have to be bothered. It’s the mixed privilege of the job. However, because the concept of education in love has such low status, things tend to go terribly wrong when there’s a lesson to impart. From a lack of confidence in the legitimacy of their task, the lover with something to teach may be neither calm nor prepared. Furthermore, because so much is at stake A fear of not being listened to over something vital can quickly explode into rage or something similar. As for the one who has something to learn, Our culture immediately makes them feel that feedback is by nature unromantic and illegitimate. They can feel – got at – picked on – and humiliated and so may fall back on that comforting yet nonsensical line, “You wouldn’t criticize me if you loved me.” In love, we’re too often terrible educators and students. Yet in truth, we’re all so imperfect, We’ve got to teach and learn. Good criticism is the salvation not the end of love. A lot about love IS about tolerating and accepting frailties. But some of it is also about offering the sort of feedback that no one else gives a damn enough about to give us. Love should not be about cherishing everything, But about seeing the full potential in one another And therefore, about trusting in one another enough to listen to challenging information. Good love means two people on a rotating basis, knowing how to take on the roles both of really kind teacher and deeply open minded, undefensive student. Did you know the School of Life is actually a place. Ten places, in fact. Campuses all over the world. From Melbourne to London. Taipei to Istanbul. With classes, books, and lots more. Please click on the link below, to explore more.

100 thoughts on “Why Love Involves Teaching”

  1. The part in the cinema where the sound of a train are heard before the guy snaps reminded me a lot of the restaurant scene in "The Godfather"

  2. Go MGTOW, It's not worth it, I learned the hard way and believe me I gave and did everything I can to make it work.

  3. Zero American women believe this. "I am perfect – you need to become who I need you to be like, yesterday. Oh, and I'm not going to tell you what it is I want you to be, so good luck!" Dating in America is a farcical dark comedy of entitlement, deep-seated mental health issues, and unmitigated narcissism.

  4. I had some of those moments with my ex. I was the one making noises with my mouth. but even drinking tea she was anoyed with the sound of the liquid flowing. There is a name for someone who gets annoyed with any sound?

  5. Is there one "School of life" in México?, if not, I would like to know how to support for it to come here.

    Thanks anyway 🙂

  6. I must have croossed over to another side of youtube because i was looking for something else.

  7. Hi School of Life! I was wondering if you could make a video on empathy. An around 6 month relationship I am for all intents and purposes recently out of has ended because of I think a lack of empathy I am experiencing. When I am in person it was great. We would talk about similar things, make each other laugh; it was just fun to be around her. However, whenever I wasn't with her or when I am physically away from others, I can't bring myself to care. I also have a nagging feeling that I don't care about people as much as I should, even when they are standing right in front of me. I have seen Alain talk about reasons to break up with someone, and if I recall correctly it should only be done if the other person is the root of the problem. The girl I broke up with definitely wasn't, she fucking loved me, and I'm deathly terrified I've made a huge mistake. Would love if you could get back to me in some regard, whether that's in text or video. Thanks for taking the time to read this~

  8. I have learned so much from my husband. He has definitely changed so much to make our lives easier. I'm super proud of him <3 Some things though were things I had to learn to be more forgiving about. I've become a much better person because of him. <3

  9. Drinking milk out of the container seems like a bigger problem to me than leaving the fridge open 🤔

  10. Thank you for the video! It really reminded me when Oprah said: "Love doesn't hurt'…" A lot of people make the mistake and think that love & pain go together! I feel you've cleared this one up

  11. Honestly, maybe if you need to change that much about your partner you should each be with someone else better suited to one another. There's no single "right" way to live and besides, who would get to be the authority if there was?

  12. I hope your store is in every country so I could drop by, because those countries you've mentioned was not my homeland. 🙁
    Anyways, great video. The end was an unexpected turn LOL

  13. This one makes me sad. I've been the rage person too many times. At least I can see it now a little.

  14. you guys should do some versions of this videos with spanish subs on them, because I always wanted to show some of these vids to my non english speaking friends.I hope my english was right haha

  15. I really like your videos, but could you wind back a bit – how do I start to love? I've never done it before and am quite clueless, frankly. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

  16. A huge red flag is where a potential partner has a bad habit that you hate, but which they refuse to change. It will wear at your relationship until the day it ends.

  17. Everybody saying the man in the video looks like Samurai Jack but all I could think of was Professor Utonium from Powerpuff Girls

  18. I love the animation here. I love how she was chewing and then fell asleep. Woke up n knocked the food off his hand. Lmao.

  19. Why are you showing a video of a woman assaulting a man like it's no big deal????? This is what's wrong with society.

  20. What success is greater than mutually understanding valid Love to facilitate an exponential offset for peace?
    Love is a continual belief in the variable choice as Hope (not result) for Happiness; respectful choice by each 1/2 reciprocally makes 1 selfless circle. _Cause and Effect
    Ps Hope's limit is Love, and both limit you to Happiness.
    (Human Nature Love Pattern) https://www.facebook.com/notes/eternal-optimism/causality-of-love-cause-and-effect-law-of-love/10157264829300720

  21. A kind teacher – one holding a stick! Seen a few BDSM references in these videos; each to their own but a lover who gets off on hurting you seems like an unhealthy model.

  22. Yea, then some time later she tells me that I walk in the apartment too fast, then too slow, then too loudly, then too quietly, because apparently it was my fault that she broke that thing, because I accidentally startled her, because she could hear me walk in.

    Oh yea… we are not together anymore. Crazy, huh?

  23. For example, how do I tell my significant other that I hate the way he loudly chews his food without offending him?

  24. School girl-teacher roleplaying aside, this is a very interesting video. In 2019 (although this trend started years ago) any form of criticism is met with outrage and immediately labeled hate. Take for example the long list of -isms prevalent in the media, both social media and otherwise. The Western world has been brainwashed to put up a wall at the first sign of disapproval and disagreement. This creates an army of people who go through life literally doing whatever they want in the most selfish way because rules, customs, traditions are perceived as oppression and counterproductive to their need to express themselves even if this is, in fact, obnoxious and inappropriate. And let's be honest, it very obnoxious and inappropriate in most cases. I said "Western world" because everywhere else the sense of community or the greater good are far more important than my obsession to impose my wants and needs on others. Unfortunately, social media is changing the landscape because whoever is part of it is bombarded 24/7 with "foreign issues" in their feeds and whatever the message is they're taking it as gospel. I've witnessed it and it is extremely concerning because ironically it doesn't happen in reverse because the Western world has been sending a message for a very long time now that reads "we know better and this is how things must be done"
    As far as dating goes which is why I decided to watch this clip in the first place, in my experience I find that dating somebody from the non-Western world is way less draining and less complicated but also a lot more straightforward. Plus, you hardly ever hear anybody saying "I don't want drama in my life" (don't get me wrong, I do appreciate the idea behind it) which it is now a red flag that hints at an extremely low tolerance threshold and, as this clip mentions, the inability to listen to others in a way that promotes personal growth.

  25. Yes! Calm communication, listening without getting defensive, and being honest are so important to learning each other 💖💖

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