Key & Peele – Text Message Confusion – Uncensored


– “BEEN TRYING TO REACH OUT
TO YOU ALL DAY. ARE WE ON FOR TONIGHT?” [sighs]
JEEZ. – WHAT?
YOU CAN’T CATCH ME. YOU CAN’T CATCH ME. I’M LANCE MOORE.
TOUCHDOWN, BITCH. WHAT?
PAUSE. [phone chimes] OH, SHOOT. KEEGAN’S BEEN TEXTING ME. “SORRY, DUDE,
MISSED YOUR TEXTS. “I ASSUMED WE’D MEET AT THE BAR. WHATEVER.
I DON’T CARE.” [phone chimes] – “SORRY, DUDE,
MISSED YOUR TEXTS. “I ASSUMED WE’D MEET AT THE BAR. WHATEVER.
I DON’T CARE.” “WHATEVER. I DON’T CARE”? WHAT THE FUCK IS HIS PROBLEM? “DO YOU EVEN WANT TO HANG OUT?” – “DO YOU EVEN WANT
TO HANG OUT?” OH, THAT’S CONSIDERATE. “LIKE I SAID, WHATEVER.” – “LIKE I SAID, WHATEVER”? FUCK THIS GUY. JESUS, “YOU…” – “ARE FUCKING PRICELESS.” AWW.
“YOU’RE THE…” – “ONE WHO’S FUCKING PRICELESS”? THIS M– THIS MOTHERFUCKER HERE. OH, HE WANTS TO–
OKAY, MM-HMM. MM-HMM.
OKAY. “YOU WANT TO GO…” – “RIGHT NOW?” HMM. GUESS I COULD DO THAT. [clears throat] “OKAY…” – “OKAY, LET’S GO”? HE SAID OKA–
“OKAY, LET’S GO”? ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU KNOW WHAT?
“YOU WANT TO REALLY…” – “DO THIS NOW?”
KEEGAN, YOU NUT. YOU’RE NOT PUTTING ME OUT. – “FUCK YEAH, LET’S DO IT”? OH, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! – “FIRST ROUND’S MINE.” – OH, NO!
OH, NO! THERE AIN’T GONNA BE
NO ROUNDS, ASSHOLE! IT’S GONNA BE
A FUCKING STREET FIGHT! THIS SON OF A– – ♪ ‘CAUSE TONIGHT WE GONNA
PARTY AND THE PARTY DON’T STOP ♪ – YOU! – BUDDY! LIKE I SAID, FIRST ROUND’S MINE. A BEER AND A GIMLET
FOR MY PARTNER RIGHT– WHAT’S THAT? – UH, I-I GOT YOU
A BASEBALL BAT WITH NAILS IN IT. – FOR MY POST-APOCALYPTIC
JACKIE ROBINSON COSTUME. HOW DID YOU KNOW?

100 thoughts on “Key & Peele – Text Message Confusion – Uncensored”

  1. Zi feel like this skit is comparing personality types of coffee drinkers with personality types of Cannabis smokers.

  2. Gosh, I know a woman who is just like this. A nice responce becomes a heated exchange because she's that emotional. I'd tell her we need to talk on the phone more. But she only hide behind txting to say waht she wanted amd respond the way she felt. And were no longer friends because of miscamunication.

  3. I'm laughing cause this is so true. Had an old friend and whenever we would try to text him about hanging out he would always just say whatever, like WTF does that even mean. Say yes or nah Man. It was so frustrating and he know it was but kept doing 😡

  4. I had a professor in college who would show this video on the first day of class to let his students know to be clear in their emails to him, and to not be so vague.

  5. When he lost his shit alone at home and called his most agreeable friend a fucking asshole over misinterpreting the text he received, I lost my shit.

  6. I just noticed Jordan Peele is singing the party all night lmfao parody song they did in that other sketch. Funny little detail.

  7. Honestly you look so much like deadpool in the intro photo thing. I don't know what to call it, I guess its called a thumbnail.

  8. Mad aside this scene turned me on to the show. These Geniuses can stretch out the smallest microcosm of life in a very brilliant different way constantly. Consistently bringing the fuckin heat, even the toss away jokes when they're just fucking around. Big part of my comedic fungus as a single 29 YO' reluctant white person from Indiana. Just illuminating their vast reach and relateability

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