8 Everyday Phrases That May Actually Sound Rude! Improve Communication Skills | Public Speaking Tips



Have
you ever heard someone say something rude, that had you wondering, what was he even thinking
when he said that? Most people have experienced that, so much so that I have had people say
really rude things to me, things like, “hey, you’ve lost a ton of weight”, well is
that even rude? Yes it is. I’ll tell you later in the lesson why. So people say rude
things all the time, but that doesn’t make it okay. We need to learn to be good conversationalist,
that means a person avoid saying things that are nosey, rude or sarcastic. Well if you
have a tendency to say the wrong things or have bad timings with your comments, you need
to change your behavior. Maybe you can study a list of conversation starters before going
to a party or maybe you could have a friend to give you a sign that, ‘hey, you are about
to say something that someone may not like’. Okay, it’s important to remember that social
etiquette includes what you say. So you need to be careful about what you say to others
at home, in the office, at parties and even in your college. So in today’s session you
are going to learn about “eight rude things that you should never say”, my name is Michelle
and you are watching me on Skillopedia, the place to develop skills for the real world.
So the first rude comment that I’ve heard is, “have you lost weight?” Umm, so when
you ask someone if he or she has lost weight, you are actually suggesting that the person
was really fat and that’s why the comment is more negative than positive. Instead you
could say something that, “you look fabulous, I wish I had your secret”, so this way you
have the opportunity to find out about a great diet, probably their secret to losing weight
and also giving a pleasant compliment which will add to your liking. The next rude comment
is, “Are you not feeling well?” This is even an insult I think, even if you say it
out of concern, because you’re tell the person that they don’t look good especially
at your work place. So you would rather say, “How are you?” that’s a better way to
ask someone about how they are feeling instead of putting it negatively and saying, “are
you not feeling well?” So you can act something about how long it’s been since you saw them
last, you could say that, “hey it’s been so long since I saw you, are you okay?”
Maybe the person will even tell you that they had a tragedy in their family or they may
tell you that they just got over Flu and you will get your answer without having to ask
the question, “are you not feeling well?” So you could frame a question about someone’s
health in a more polite manner like this, “how are you, didn’t see you for three
days.” Moving on, the next rude question that I’ve heard is, “are you still single?”
Hmm, a lot of people ask that to each other. So asking a single person this question, give
the impression that you think something is wrong with them that’s why they don’t
have a partner and if you feel that you should know the person’s relationship status, simply
ask if he or she has been seeing anyone? This means that he or she has been dating anyone
lately, so you could say something like, “have you been seeing someone lately?” or if it’s
a very close friend you could say, “What’s cooking?” but don’t say, “are you still
single?” The next comment is, “I don’t like what is being served”, so when you’ve
been invited for a dinner, and your host serves something that you don’t like, please don’t
say that you don’t like it, you have to try to act like it’s your favorite food
in the entire world. And when you sit down at the table you can have small bites of that
even if you don’t like it. But please avoid saying that, it’s something that you hate.
If you are asked that why you didn’t eat much? You can simply say, “I’m not that
hungry but I enjoyed the conversation.” So the thing is, if you say you don’t like
it, it can come across as an insult and it may happen that you'll not be invited to another
dinner party by that host again. Another rude comment that I heard recently was, “I paid
so much money for that watch.” Okay so don’t be one of those people who focus on the cost
of everything. My colleague recently bought a smart watch, and the first thing he told
me about the watch was the cost. So the problem here is that you will sound like an arrogant
person if you come right out and tell people how much something costed you or how expensive
something was. Besides it’s really doesn’t matter how much you’ve paid, and you may
cause the other person feel inferior if their watch is not expensive. So the strategy for
this one would be, to not share the price at all unless someone asks you, how much something
cost you? The next one is, I heard my colleague recently tell me, “my boss says, I am her
favorite” well this is playing rude, especially when you are talking to your colleague, you
are telling them you are not as good as me. So instead of saying something like that,
just praise your boss or praise your superior and mention something you like about your
job. Of course you don’t want the other person to feel inferior and kill their confidence.
So you’d rather say, “I am having a great time working here because of our boss, he
has made me feel very comfortable” So don’t go about telling people that you are your
boss’s favourite because that can make them feel inferior. Okay another comment that usually
comes from my friends is “I told you so…” okay even I have an urge to say this when
someone makes a mistake related to something that I warned them about. So this one is a
common mistake but it’s a big no-no. So what they hear is, you did not listen to me,
that’s all your fault, I’m so much better than you. I know you didn’t say that, you
just said, “I told you so…” but it’s not good to insult someone when the other
person needs your help more than ever. So instead of keeping tabs on the rights and
the wrongs, think of ways how you can help your friend in trouble. You could offer help
by saying something like, “hey how can I help you in this situation?” Instead of
saying, “I told you so, you shouldn’t have done that.” The next one is, “This
should be easy” Okay so for different people, different things are difficult, everyone has
their own Everest and if you are telling somebody that their job is easy then what you are doing
is, you are reducing the value of their effort, and you are telling them that they don’t
deserve the salary that they have” And what they actually hear is, “It’s easy for
most people, if you are finding it hard, probably something is wrong with you. So someone is
struggling and coming for help then they have trusted you enough to show you their weaknesses,
you shouldn’t be rude by saying, that it should be easy, right? So avoid saying this
to people you ask you for some help. And now the last one is, “Good luck”. Well, this
one does not have much of a problem, I’ve heard this from so many people, and there
is nothing really wrong with it. But it kind of sound as if they are saying that, there’s
nothing you can do that will make you succeed, only luck will. Let’s hope that you can
succeed. I often choose to not use this one. I say something like, “Show them your guts”
or “give them something they’ll never forget” I just choose one of these to encourage
my friend instead of saying, “good luck”. So you’ve just said something wrong, the
other person is looking at you with a red angry face but the issue is not about what
you said, it’s about what they’ve heard, so there are some sentences that act like
deadly silent ninjas killing self-confidence. So these were the ones that I’ve told you
today. These are the rude comments and questions that you should avoid asking your friends
or your colleagues. So today you’ve learnt ten things that you should never say to someone,
I hope you’ll be careful in the future, to never use these ten statements instead
use the alternatives that I’ve given you. So thank you so much for staying with me here
on Skillopedia, the place to develop skills for the real world, see you very soon, bye.

44 thoughts on “8 Everyday Phrases That May Actually Sound Rude! Improve Communication Skills | Public Speaking Tips”

  1. Great point about sounding arrogant if you focus on the cost or start talking about the cost of things without being asked. I think we've all heard that one in one way or another. Cheers!

  2. DEAR teacher,brilliant explanation for how to deal with awful comment.I'm grateful for this.god bless you

  3. Very nice lesson Michelle. And every point to be worth remembered. But .. what I have realized from my life experience is that rude comments are mostly made by those who usually made rude comments more or less every time intentionally. They love to put down people they come across because they are jealous or may be for some other reasons. But thank you for this video lesson.

  4. اذا ما تشرحي بلعربي بعد ما اتابع القناة لانه لم افهم بلكامل رجاءا

  5. Excellent choice of rude phrases and their counters. Very informative video with appropriate examples. Thank you 😁

  6. Ma'am why don't you make videos for girls for how to manage Their looks and personality while college .Also how you maintain your beauty ?

  7. Hi Michelle,
    Really appreciate to giving us such a wonderful session again. This is important skill which need to improve in our personal life.
    Big Thanks for you and the team to bringing us sessions like this… All the Best for you…!!!

  8. Do you have a twin sister… like in some videos ur hair is different… in this video this look… it's not so confusing… just want to know…

  9. If a person is upset about something. Don't throw gas onto the fire. Perfect example, don't ever call a person a whiner. Basically, don't kick a person when they are down. There was a time "if you have nothing good to say, don't say it" the times have changed most people… People would rather criticize or condemn, they ignore you otherwise unless to insult you. Silent unless being negative

  10. 👉The Art Of Saying ‘I Don’t Give A Damn!’
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hwkavu-F9r0

    👉 Why People Don’t Understand You?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcW9fs5H778
    👉Why Only 5% People Are Successful?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCfWyBLJfUU
    👉Follow our Stories on Instagram –
    http://www.instagram.com/letstalkpodcast

  11. It's a great platform to acquire skills and practice them in real life situations which really bothers us. Skillopedia explains to sort out disputes and controversies which humanity comes across….#i do love it.

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